First Post

getting ready to leave and thought i'd write in the first post before i left --

i didn't really get nervous for leaving until about a day or so ago when i actually started to tackle packing, and then all of a sudden i was terrified -- i'm realizing now that israel probably would've been enough of an experience for my summer so i'm feeling a little over my head going into india but i know that it will bring nothing but good things and experiences so i'm trying to just focus on that and not how scared shitless i am for leaving. there's no real way to prepare for a trip like this (packing-wise or mentally) and i hate feeling unprepared.

i remember doing the ropes course at camp and the last obstacle was standing on this pole 25 ft up and being forced to jump to try and reach a ledge 10 ft away. It was basically impossible to reach teh ledge, but you were strapped into the ropes course system and they weren't going to let you die so it was as much about trying for the ledge (and failing) as it was about trusting the rope. i remember watching other people go before me and noticing that the longer they stood on top of the pole, contemplating the jump and staring at how far away the ground was the more likely they were to be paralyzed by fear and the less likely they were to jump. it was one of those "take a deep breath and just go" things - don't even think about all the possibilities for failure or fear or disaster, don't even think at all, just GO.

this is also one of those moments.